i can't seem to shut my trapper up

yes, i have found new freedom in this blog. nobody i know knows i have this. so i can say whatever the heck i want to say. well, i will probably blab that i have a blog to a few close friends and not that people really care to know what i have to say :D so it shouldnt really matter.

so then yes, i can't seem to shut up. i've always wanted to write about something. whenever my mind wanders, it talks and i can't shut it up. i have the most randomest thoughts in my head and they all lead to one person. that's right my friends.. all my thoughts boil down to one person, him. my dreaded past. then when i get the chance to write them all down, my mind goes all prissy and decides to block me off and my hand from putting all of her rantings in writing.

maybe i do talk too much. in the past, i found myself in umcompromising situations most of the time because i couldnt just shut my trapper up. i've always been that curious cat that gets killed in the end. i ask too many questions and learn too many things that i shouldnt know in the first place. but this, being the curious cat that i am, saved my life, or so i think. there was this one time that i trusted my instincts. i knew something fishy was going on so i dug a hole so deep that i couldnt climb out of it. all of it lead to a serious heartbreak. i sometimes regret questioning everything around me but if i dont, if i stop wondering.. then what would make the world go round?